


Soundless

by Cyanidal



Category: Hermitcraft RPF
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, M/M, Permadeath AU, These two need to talk out their problems rationally, but that doesn't happen here of course, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:09:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27972881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cyanidal/pseuds/Cyanidal
Summary: "Now, there was nothing left but a strip of red fabric. Red fabric and a broken man carrying precise recollection of those final moments.Because despite it all, even when you believe there’s nobody around, you do make a sound. And it’s one that can never be unheard."Inspired directly by Kryantics/Vexatms Animatic found here - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVhvfd7Ez5oAnd RedXD's fic(But with my own spin on it)
Relationships: Docm77/BdoubleO100
Comments: 2
Kudos: 36





	Soundless

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Did I Even Make A Sound?](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25012156) by [RedXD](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedXD/pseuds/RedXD). 



> Inspired by this Animatic - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVhvfd7Ez5o  
> And the work tagged
> 
> I adored the Animatic and the fic, I ended up inspired enough to write my own spin on it. Except I couldn't help but ah, change the ending a bit. Oops?

Bdubs couldn’t even remember why they were fighting. Tears stung his eyes but he refused to let them fall, glaring straight forward into Doc’s eyes. Honestly, he didn’t even care what the argument was over, probably a disagreement of missing resources or villager trades. Did it even matter anymore? 

“This is stupid.”  
  
 _Come on, yell at me. Do something._  
  
Doc frowned but said nothing. This just made the smaller man angrier, shoving his hands out at Doc’s chest. While Doc was stronger, he stepped back with the force anyway. Bdubs was straightening himself out when the hybrid man spoke up.  
  
“We’d be better off if we never met.”  
  
 _...wait, what?_  
  
The builder’s head snapped up to meet Doc’s eyes but the taller man was looking anywhere else. A thousand thoughts ran rampant through his mind as it caught up with itself. Sure, they fought a lot, more than they should. Yeah, he picked more fights with the redstoner than he should, but Doc couldn’t be serious. _He couldn’t be._ _  
__  
_He reached out unconsciously and felt his heart pang as Doc stepped further out of reach.  
  
“Doc, wait, you can’t be serious-”  
  
“No, Bdubs, I am serious. This is a waste of time and energy - it’s stupid, just like you said. You and I do nothing but fight. It’s so _fucking exhausting_ and I’m tired of this. So no, I am serious. We never should have met.”  
  
The builder suddenly felt more alone than ever as Doc’s back turned toward him. His rage boiled over as the man refused to pay him any more attention. His anger was so misplaced, self-hatred mingling with the sudden adrenaline spike of fear from losing someone so dear.  
  
He snapped.  
  
“I fucking hate you.”  
  
 _No, that’s not quite right-_  
  
But it was too late, Doc spun around, eye wide as he processed what Bdubs had just yelled. As he did, Doc’s face shifted between surprise, shock, until it landed on anger. He stepped forward again, crowding Bdub’s space.  
  
 _Just where Bdubs wants him to stay._  
  
“Come again?”  
  
“You heard me, Jackass.”  
  
Suddenly a hand was fisted in his shirt but he couldn’t care less. This was the only way to get close enough to what he wanted, to what he could never have. He just wished those eyes would watch him with something more than Anger.  
  
“Then leave.”  
  
 _...No._  
  
That...hadn’t been what Bdubs was expecting. Maybe a fist to the face, a shove into the dirt. But no, he hadn’t been expecting a simple resignation. Nothing more than a blatant example of how fed up he was. Or maybe that’s how it was always destined to be. He chose not to reply, watching Doc who just huffed in annoyance as he dropped the builder’s shirt.  
  
This was what he wanted, right? This was the consequence of chasing what he craved. The closest to the dreams he can never touch. The dreams he goes back to every night because they’re the only hope he has. So this was just the best outcome he had. Except now he’d taken it too far.  
  
 _Right?_  
  
He steps back toward the ledge, rockets in hand as the tears threaten to fall. Doc watches him with a dark eye and the builder just keeps asking himself why he does this. Why does he choose to fall and take Doc down with him? _Why does he choose to destroy them both?_  
  
Instead of asking, he shakily smiles at the redstoner.  
  
“Okay.”  
  
Then he’s falling backward, wings spreading underneath him. He flips around midair and fires a rocket, aiming toward the water. It’s dark below him, an endless expanse as far east as the eye can see. He drags an arm through the cold waves, wondering if he could ever be as carefree as the water. As uncaring.  
  
The water has nowhere to be and nothing to worry over.  
  
He wishes he could be the same.  
  
Instead, he angles upward, firing more rockets to take him higher into the sky. The water fades away to the solid ground below, the grass a dark green in the nighttime’s gentle light. It was peaceful, high in the sky. Away from the consequences of his actions, and away from his regrets.  
  
He doesn’t hate Doc, he never has. And he never wanted Doc to hate him. But Bdubs was never good with feelings, nor was he any good at voicing them. Instead, it just becomes something muddled, a sad mix of sand and water. Inseparable and messy and something impossible to make any sort of foundation with. Yet the builder tried to form his house upon the broken foundation; there’s no one to blame for the structural failure but himself.  
  
The redstoner has his heart, has had it for such a long time, yet he can’t voice it to save his life. It comes out as insults and annoyances, anything to keep the man's attention on him. Anything to keep him close to him, until it went too far.  
  
Now, Doc hated him.  
  
His emotional barrier breaks as the turmoil crashes through the built-up walls as he forces himself higher in the sky, the tears now streaming down his face as his heart beats painfully. He could still see the goat’s head and the figure lying on it from where he was in height. His chest gives a dull ache as he wished he could be there with him, sharing a moment under the stars. Wishes Doc would hold him, comfort him. Wishes he could do the same. That maybe then the man he envies so much would help him learn to be a better man himself.  
  
Bdub’s is startled out of all of his misery at the sound of ripping followed by a short whistle. Looking back just confirms his worst nightmare.  
  
 _“FUCK!”_  
  
He was falling, fast, and he had no way to stop himself. The water was too far away and he’d left everything at home. _Because the night wasn’t supposed to turn out like this._

  
He was falling as the gravity of the earth and his regrets pulled him down, faster and faster. The tears fell but he didn’t scream. No; he had no reason to. It was his own fault that it’d come to this. There was no one to blame but himself as the land below grew closer and closer.  
  
Soundlessly he fell, the only noise the wind rushing past his ears.  
  
He was alone and he’d die alone, that’s all there was to it.  
  
Yet in the end, his regrets were far more painful than the momentary cracks in his bones.  
  
 _I’m sorry, Doc_ _  
__  
_**_BdoubleO100 fell from a high place_ ** _  
__  
_

* * *

  
There’s a pain deep in his chest that never fades, no matter how much time passes. The red headband tied around his arm is a stark reminder of his biggest failure. Despite what the others say, it never gets easier.  
  
 _If only he’d been a little faster_  
  
Seeing his half of the mansion forever dark and collecting dust is just another wound on Doc’s heart, already full of open wounds that reopen daily. Maybe one day it would get easier, only time would really tell.  
  
 _If only he’d seen a little sooner_  
  
Until then, he’d trudge forward painfully. He knew Bdubs would be upset if he gave up so easily, or he thought he might be. Even that was unclear after their last conversation and the heated words thrown. More memories he wished he could forget.  
  
 _If only he had held his tongue_ _  
__  
_All Doc could do was laugh darkly to himself as the tears fell from his eye once again. He never meant it, he could never regret meeting Bdubs. Despite the hurt from the words the smaller man always spoke, he never regretted their friendship. He never could.  
  
 _If only_ __  
  
Now, there was nothing left of what was - and what could have been - except a strip of red fabric. Red fabric and a broken man carrying a precise recollection of those final moments.

Because despite it all, even when you believe there’s nobody around, you do make a sound. And it’s one that can never be unheard.


End file.
